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Day 3 is a day at sea, as we make our way to Croatia, and I spent my time watching the various “guests” and found them to be quiet entertaining. They come in all shapes, sizes, and ages (mostly 50 to 90 years). There are those that want to lie in the sun, those that head for the free food, those that walk around in circles on the running track on deck 11. Then there are the blind guests with their dogs and the disabled in their motorised chairs and then the retarded. Well they look retarded; they are usually with the blind guests. Then off course there are the gamblers and drinkers. They don’t go out much. There are honeymooners (of all ages)(you don’t see much of them outdoors either!). I spent some time watching the activity at the ice cream station. Ice cream, soft serve, vanilla, chocolate, full fat, yoghurt, low fat, fat free, in a cone, bowl, cup, plate, you name the way the Americans love ice cream! But mostly it’s the free stuff on deck 9, that is self served 24 hours a day. There are three or four of these giant soft serve ice cream machines with a choice of plain vanilla, chocolate or mixed half & half. I tried some that other day. Could not get the machine to work. Had to get Margot to help me. Managed to get a taste of the chocolate/vanilla stuff. Not as bad as I thought it would be, but not so enjoyable. Today I spent some time researching who eats all this free ice cream. You have to waddle up to the machine with your plastic bowl readied. Next pull down hard on the lever that says chocolate, when your bowl is half full change over to the mixed version. Eyes look right. At this point you notice the other machine that says frozen yoghurt soft serve (obviously more healthy?). You move over and fill the rest of your fairly large plastic yellow bowl up. Hmm. Right next to the spoons you have a choice of three delicious sauces, maple syrup, chocolate (again) and berry (well it’s red in colour). You’re not sure which one to try and I can see the dilemma on your face. Eventually, after a long moment, you pour all three sauces over your by now over flowing bowl. Now waddle back to your table, get comfortable, realise you have no spoon, and then send your husband back to collect a spoon. Enjoy! Don’t go back for seconds right now as there is some stranger watching you (me), sneak back at midnight. Footnote: The frozen yoghurt and ice cream machines are both filled with the same white grey liquid, both also taste identical. I have been told that the frozen yoghurt is definitely lighter in calories. You also have to be 15 to 80 kilograms overweight to really enjoy the ice cream.

About the author: oliver